Personal sabotage at it’s finest!!!

I had thought that once I finally got laid the sexual tension would dissipate…However it turned out not to be the case! If anything it had become even more consuming and I was in two minds as to how I felt about it.
I was hoping that once I had satisfied my primal urge for sex I could get back to some sense of normalcy or at least get more than 2 -3 hours of sleep a night but in the same token the sexual tension is so delicious that I wanted to keep those feelings forever!

While I would have quite happily gone back to M’s the next morning for breakfast sex, circumstances and prior commitments meant that we would not get the opportunity to see each other again until possibly Wednesday evening. Fuck! how was I going to last 3 days?

I found that over the next couple of days, my mind was consumed with M and with sex, it was extremely distracting and very difficult to concentrate at work. My inner bitch and I were having a raging war on what it was all about and why I was consumed almost to the point of obsession. Was it just the heady, giddy feeling of someone experiencing something wonderful for the first time or was there something more?

I am a very logical person, sometimes in jest others have referred to me as being very Vulcan like (Star trek analogy)! So rather than just feel something I always have to analyse, compartmentalize and reconcile my feelings and emotions. No matter how hard I tried, I just could not put my finger on what these feelings were all about and I seriously had started to wish that I had not walked down this path of sensuality and sex!!..not to mention something else!!

M and I had a dinner date for Wednesday evening, after that he was leaving for 10 days on business so I decided I would extract every little bit of delicious pleasure that I could on Wednesday and then use the 10 day break to evaluate where I was going with this.
I know I could have just ended it then and there but hell…I’m not an idiot!! I at least wanted one more night of sensual pleasure before I kissed it goodbye forever!!!

One thought on “Personal sabotage at it’s finest!!!

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