The Dooms of online dating…yes there are dooms!!

So after blocking M I decide to un-hide my profile on POF and  go throw myself back into the pond and see what I can catch.

The following are excerpts from several of the weird, and wacky conversations I have had recently in Plenty of fish…Names may or may not have been modified depending on their creep factor and if they deserve anonymity.

The first conversation is with R and I need to give you a little background on how this dialogue came about…After all my mixed feelings with the situation with M I thought fuck it, I am switching sides. I could be totally wrong here but I think there is a little bit of Bi-curiosity in all of us and I figured hell if I found sex with men better than chocolate maybe sex with woman will be like eating the whole fucking bar of chocolate with no guilt.

I changed a filter on POF and did a search for woman looking for woman in a 25 mile radius and started scrolling through looking at profiles. It did not take me long to realize switching sides was never going to happen. There was zero sexual  interest, nothing, nada, zilch!!….The next day I logged onto POF and found a message from R.

R: Hi
Jad: Hi, how are  you
R: I am good, just doing repairs on the washing machine
Jad: Oh, more than I could do I can barely change a light bulb
R: oh I am good with my hands, so many things I can do with my hands.
Jad: Yeah I am not good with my hands at all unless it comes to typing, then I am a fucking ninja……… I get no more messages from R and I wonder what scared her off!! The following day I sent her another message.
Jad: I supposed you are wondering why I looked at your profile when my profile says I am looking for a man.
R: no

That’s it..end of conversation…I figured I just need to leave that one alone!! I just hope I have not ruined it between me and R on the off chance I might need her to help fulfill a fantasy of one of my future sex buddies!!

Next up we have Ryan….it seems that the online dating world is proliferate with young men seeking older woman. Ryan is a very nice looking young man..YOUNG being the operative word, and he deserved to be played with!!

Ryan: What’s up sexy, into younger fit hung guys?
Jad: Ryan I could so eat you up but what the heck are you doing looking to sleep with a 50 year old???
Ryan: Older the berry the sweater the juice 😉
Jad: Really? wow I never knew…You know if I did not have morals I would probably take you up on your offer but I have kids almost your age and I am pretty sure I have some  underwear around here somewhere older than you so I am going to pass but good luck with finding your “Mrs Robinson”
Ryan: Ahhhh, well you can wear the underwear that are older than me, that’s cool
Jad: Ryan your are hysterical, wait!! are you sure that is your picture, maybe you are not such a hottie and are 59 and fugly!!

Sadly Ryan decided he no longer wanted to continue our conversation and he did not confirm or deny if that was really his picture!!

If you have been following my blog from the beginning you would have read about Wendellove here…if not, go read, it will open in a new window!!
I guess Wendellove realized that I had blocked him and he created a new profile however there was zero information about him and no picture, it was pretty much a blank profile…In hind sight what I should have done was just blocked him right away but I can be such a bitch at times and I figured I would just play with him a little first….this is how the conversation went!!

Day one
wendellcoop: Hi
I ignored this message because even without a pic or profile info instinct told me it was the same person
Day two
wendellcoop: Hey you
Jad: Hi
wendellcoop: So what you looking for.
Jad: pretty much what is in my profile, your profile tells me absolutely nothing about you!
wendellcoop: Im single looking for a true lady just ake me ill tell you.
Jad: I am not looking for a long term commitment, the main thing I am looking for is intelligent conversation over dinner
wendellcoop: Yes im looking for that also
Jad: You probably need to put some information on your profile then and include a picture because it is very hard to begin an intelligent dialogue with someone who is so closed on their profile
wendellcoop: Well yes i did it fast ill go back and put more information about my self
Jad: why do it so fast, I think it is important if you are searching for something that you spend time and attention in getting it right
wendellcoop: So true
wendellcoop: So what you like and dont like
Jad: why don’t you start with telling me about yourself, I feel like I am at a disadvantage because you have things on my profile about me and I have no information about you
wendellcoop: Ok i work everyday have my own place my own vehicle i love going to movies out to eat long walks in the park.
Jad: what do you do for a job?
wendellcoop: I work at a school district doing air conditioning work for 17 years.
Jad: Interesting. How old are you
wendellcoop: 48
Jad: What do you like in a woman
wendellcoop: The way she Carries herself i woman that handle her businesses work hard and not a player.
Jad: I am not for you then. I spent the last 30 years of my life that way and it was boring so now I am playing the field
wendellcoop: Well play the field with me i can satisfy you in all ways.
Jad: You just told me you don’t like players
wendellcoop: But i can really please you trust me
Jad: Fix your profile and put up a photo then talk to me
wendellcoop: When i get off work i wil what you like in bed
Jad: I am hotter than you have ever had…..fix your profile and try to speak in complete sentences
wendellcoop: I will fix it
wendellcoop: I can tell you one thing ones i get with you you wouldn’t want anybody else im the total package in bed and out of bed ill be more than happy to prove it to you in person im a 100% satisfaction.
wendellcoop: Whats wrong you scared.
wendellcoop: I want to see how hotter you really are.
wendellcoop: Well you stop texting
Jad: I am at work
wendellcoop: What you do on your job
wendellcoop: I can make you so happy ill take good care of you give you good money causes thats what a real man does.
Jad: I am taken care of financially and I am pretty sure I earn at least 3 times more than you. I also do not want or need taking care of. I am a strong independent woman who can take care of herself
wendellcoop: Okay is your needs beening taking care of in bed.
wendellcoop: I just no i can make you happy sex wise and in other way.
Jad: Wendell I am at work. Fix your profile then type to me later
wendellcoop: Ok
wendellcoop: You dont no what you missing baby bbc.
wendellcoop: Do you think you can handle me my cell number is xxx xxx 1403.
wendellcoop: Hello
wendellcoop: So you dont want to talk to me your online
wendellcoop: Lets meet for dinner
wendellcoop: Hey lets do this
wendellcoop: Ok finish my profile with a picture lets chat
wendellcoop: So you not texting me whats up
wendellcoop: Hello lets chat please
wendellcoop: So you didnt like my profile
wendellcoop: Hey whats up why you not texting me back
wendellcoop: Hey would you like to go to dinner tomorrow maybe catch a movie.
Jad: Wendell, you are a little scary!! I told you I was working and you have just been sending message after message. It is a little harassing you know!
wendellcoop: Im sorry i thought you was off please forgive me.
Jad: That is not true, I read through your messages and you were saying things like your online why don’t you talk to me. Just because it shows I am online does not mean I have it open it just means I forgot to close it on my phone.
I do not think you are a good match for me Wendell it was a little scary how you just kept messaging me
wendellcoop: I just really wanted to talk to you you have no reason to be scarrd of me im human just like you.
Jad: Wendell I am not going to message you anymore
Have a nice day and I wish you the best of luck in what you are searching for
wendellcoop: Well thats fine its nothing to trip on i just want to no you.
wendellcoop: Im sorry im really hurting right now.
Jad has successfully blocked wendellcoop

Wendell is a little intense and a little scary, he comes across as very unbalanced.
I realize I am batshit crazy but my craziness is totally quirky harmless type crazy!
I regret playing with Wendell in the beginning and had I realized how unbalanced he was I would not have done so…lesson learned for the online dating world!!
I was nervous about how intense Wendell was and I did google if it was possible for Wendell to locate me from an IP address or something, though honestly if we look at it rationally from a intelligence point of view it is surprising Wendell was able to install the POF app on his phone let alone track me by means of an IP address. Suffice to say I did not share any of my personal information with Wendell and I feel safe but this experience did reiterate to me that I should pay extra care and attention in dealing with people on the online world!!!

More dooms of dating to come……..

 

10 thoughts on “The Dooms of online dating…yes there are dooms!!

  1. IMHO I don’t think you would have gotten any intelligent conversation from “Wendellcoop” anyway. He can’t even string a sentence together properly. LOL

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Pingback: Plenty of fish OR plenty of fucked up people? | Sensuality, Sex & Something else

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