M&Ms…Can I really have my cake and eat it too???

Introducing “M” yeah, yeah I know you already met “M” but this is another “M”
Actually I already introduced him a little bit ago but here is a refresher just in case you suffer from habitual forgetfulness!!

M –This is a new one, not sure if there is going to be any physical attraction as there are two photos and one he looks extremely attractive and the other so so…he is most certainly intelligent however our conversation has not been as free flowing as I find it usually is with intelligent men…we are supposed to meet for coffee one day next week.

After several failed attempts to make a date…all of them my fault, we finally confirmed a wine date after work however due to an unexpected work related dinner engagement I had to make a last minute change to our plans and our original coffee date which got switched to a wine date was now switching back to a coffee date…Fark!! I can barely keep all their names straight and now I have to try figure out what the fuck sort of date it is!!

Anyway!! on our coffee date the conversation was free flowing, easy and interesting…however all too soon it was time for me to leave and I found myself feeling rather resentful of my dinner engagement….if not for the fact that I had to leave after only an hour I am pretty sure M2 and I would have moved on to dinner.

I should mention here about the 2 profile pics M2 has on POF…neither of them are him…well they are but they  are not..Geesh!….I have not had my morning coffee yet give me a break….I mean…he looks much better than either of those pictures.
He is very nice looking and has the most delicious eyes!!!! If I had to describe them I would say they are “come to bed eyes”

M2 and I set up a dinner date for this coming Saturday night and I seem to have found myself in a quandary of sorts!!
From my perspective there is an intellectual and physical connection with M2 and certainly for me there was chemistry, enough for me to seriously consider intimacy but now I find myself wondering if this is really what I want!!

I know, I know…I hear you saying what the fuck!! This girl can’t make up her own damn mind!! And your right! truly I cant!!

Help me work this out dear readers…On the one hand, once a week sex with M1 is just not enough, seriously not enough!! I could cut him loose and find someone who has more availability….such as M2….But M1 is oh so delicious and so very good at what he does… do I really want to give that up even if it is a once a week thing?
M2 and I have some chemistry going on and potential for sex is evident so why the hesitancy? That is just it…..I really, truly do not know why I am so hesitant about having an intimate relationship with more than one person although I do suspect it has something to do with bullshit social conventions and “norms” that are drilled into us over the years!!!

Fuck it!! I am a grown arse woman and I can do what the hell I want, when I want….What I want is to have my cake and eat it too!!!

Feel free to make a comment with suggestions, points of view, etc however if your point of view is anything related to me “not being able to have my cake and eat it” please call my complaint line that I specifically set up for you on 1800 DILLIGAF

15 thoughts on “M&Ms…Can I really have my cake and eat it too???

  1. Social conventions be damned! As consentual adults, we determine the nature and character of our relationships. You’ve listed one of your guiding principles as DILLIGAF! Live it! Don’t let societal convention dictate who you are! Live out of the box! Defy convention! Challenge perception!

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Here’s a thought Jad, if I may humbly offer…

    We actually do NOT live in a Starvation Economy. We live in an Abundance Economy! Like Kirk stated above, antiquated “Social conventions be damned!” because decayed unfeasible (self-appointed or otherwise!) social traditions CHEAT US from the most WHOLE life possible! And honestly, Nature and humans actually don’t do so well when constricted or imprisoned by society OR a person! I know, that wasn’t so “humble” a thought, but I felt obligated to share it with a fellow Explorer such as yourself Jad! 🙂 ❤

    Turning the page again…

    Liked by 1 person

    • Thank you for your humble words and I honestly could not agree with you more, it has taken a good part of my journey not just to get to the point but to be happily reconciled with it in my mind

      Liked by 1 person

      • Just know that you ARE NOT alone in this and where you are!!! You just happen to be one of the few(er) that have the hardcore COURAGE to do it and see/experience where it takes you! The fantastic thing about doing that Jad, is that you/we ALWAYS survive one way or another! 😀

        Fear stifles. Courage fulfills.” A very, very difficult life-motto for some.

        Liked by 1 person

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