Having my cake and eating it “turns my tummy!!!”

So here I am ready to take off for my next business trip to Kentucky and I find myself in the situation again where I can have the best of both worlds and get hot horny sex in both the State of Kentucky and the State of Texas. But WTF!!! Leading up to this trip the entire situation leaves my tummy in the State of utter utter turmoil!!
In fact it churns it up like there are a thousand butterflies flapping around rampant in there!!

All right, all right!! I know I said I was excited that I could have my cake and eat it too, but we all know what a FUBAR I am and I guess this is just another layer to my fucked up thinking and I don’t wanna eat cake no more!!!

What I know is that from day one I have felt that I am not the kind of person that can have multiple sex partners concurrently but who the fuck knew back then what a horny little beast I would turn out to be?? I sure as fuck didn’t!!

Up until “Mon Capitaine” and “The RodFather” and despite my voracious sexual appetite I managed to only have one sexual partner at a time and even with both The Capitaine and The RodFather I still quantified it by saying it did not count because they lived in different states… We all fucking knew that it counted and I could justify it till the cows come home but the fact of the matter is I was having sex with 2 men concurrently!!!

Here is the thing though, I was not being dishonest, they both knew about each other and we were taking appropriate precautions, besides, the entire situation was not hurting anyone so what the fuck!!!…Why the fuck should it matter if I was fucking in Kentucky and Texas???

The truth of the matter is that it was and is hurting someone…..Me!! It hurts me!!
As much as I LOVE sex, and I mean I truly fucking LOVE sex, it just does not feel right to me to have more than one person that I am sexually active with regardless of what fucking state they live in!! So here I am the day before leaving for Kentucky and my stomach feels like I fucking swallowed an ocean of butterflies!!

I have thought quite a bit about it the last few days….actually I decided well over a week ago that I was not going to pursue a sexual relationship with “The RodFather” any further however over the last few days I have been trying to work out how the fuck was I going to handle the situation!! I really like “The RodFather” He is a nice guy and we did some fun things together so I do not want to hurt his feelings but in the same token I do not want to lie to him……Thus my dilemma, hurt the guy or lie? What the fuck do I do?

I am at the point now where I have began the preparation, I have told him that I had to cut my trip back from the entire month of June to two short visits and I have also told him that things have gone to shit a little at the office so I am going to be spending a lot of hours there…Additionally my colleague  from another site is joining me this trip so I will need to spend a lot of time with him.  I know my colleague and I have planned the Casino one night and dinner one night….All of this is total truth so what I am hoping is that between “The RodFathers” commitments with his son and my work commitments that there just does not seem to be a day when we can possibly get together……The fact that I actually planned the events with my colleague on days when I knew the “The RodFather” was available is just a technicality really!!

And and just for the record……….Deciding between “The RodFather” and “Mon Capitaine” was an easy choice…sure location played a key part. I mean, I spend more time in Texas than I do in Kentucky but even if we took location out the equation I am pretty certain I would have chosen the Captain!! I mean for real!! He is EXACTLY what I was looking for from the beginning and he is so adult and so accepting about the temporary state of our relationship that I am pretty sure I am going to learn some things from him when we part ways!!…..That and his bald head..!!!

By the way, I was described to “Mon Capitaine’s” children as his “Semi Quasi” girlfriend…When I heard myself being referred to as his “Semi Quasi” girlfriend I though “what the fuck is that” and truth be told I was a little bit put out….But The Captain read a dictionary meaning of Quasi and it all makes perfect sense!!

Semi– is the Latin for half and refers to something that is half-something else
Quasi– comes from the Latin for almost and refers to something that is almost something else.

Great description don’t you think……Though if it was me I would have said Semi Quasi nympho girlfriend!!!

2 thoughts on “Having my cake and eating it “turns my tummy!!!”

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