Yes yes!! I have finally replaced broken BoB along with his disappointing replacement BoB Jr with an exceptional new version aptly named Mon BoB!! Well I say it is exceptional but to be fucking honest I have not tested Mon BoB out yet!
In fact Mon Capitaine and I went shopping in Dr Johns and he bought me my BoB replacement over a week ago however lets face it people, when you have the real thing right there in front of you why the fuck are you going to use BoB which is why I haven’t tested it out yet.
I will admit it was rather tempting this morning as this is my 3rd day without sex…Yeah for real, I am not fucking kidding you!! But you see there is a really good reason for it!! My hips hurt like a fucking beast!! When I walk right now I feel like an old lady, in fact just this morning when I went to poop…YES I really fucking did poop, in a hotel no less!! Anyway I digress, this morning when I went to poop I had to ease myself slowly down onto the toilet seat. Have you ever had to do that? Darnedest fucking thing ever and let me tell you no small feat trying to ease yourself SLOWLY down onto the toilet seat when you really really need to poop and your hips hurt like a beast!!
But here it is, day 3 and it really is time for an orgasm so I was very tempted to get Mon BoB out of his bag and have a play with him but if I did that then I would have to change it’s name.
Ya see when trying to rename BoB3 to something more interesting than BoB3, Mon Capitaine came up with Roberto… Fuck!! I almost spat my coffee out at him, or I would have if I was drinking some!! Roberto!! No fucking way! Reminds me way too much of my former middle name Roberta! I am not shitting you, who fucking does that to their kid… Roberta!! I was supposed to be a boy so my name was supposed to be Robert but surprise surprise another fucking girl….Girl number 3 in fact so my granny suggested calling me Roberta instead. Fortunately my parents had some sense of decency and absolutely refused to call me Roberta but I did end up with that horror as a middle name… I guess it is right here that I should apologize to anyone that might be reading this named Roberta… I am sorry, truly I am….. You do know you can legally change your name right??!
I did, which is why Roberta is no longer my middle name!!
So no Mon Capitaine BoB3 cannot be named Roberto!!
Last night while laying in bed discussing potential names I came up with the name Mon BoB, we already decided my first orgasm with Mon BoB should be given to me with Mon Capitaine using it and also it seemed appropriate that I allow Mon Capitaine to actually pay for it…So that when I am home in Australia and missing Mon Capitaine I can take Mon Bob out of his hidey hole and give myself an orgasm with a vibrator bought for my by Mon Capitaine and one which my first ever orgasm with it was given to me by Mon Capitaine.
So… I stayed strong, I used all my willpower and I did not take Mon BoB out of his bag.
I will say this however… Although my hips still hurt like a beast when “The Captain” gets to this hotel room after work today I am pretty fucking sure I will be jumping his bones in about 3.5 seconds!!!
Mon BoB will be waiting on the pillow for Mon Capitaine to pick it up and do his thing!!
Stay tuned for an update on if Mon BoB was successful and Oh to hear a little story about Mon Capitaine’s bum hole!!